I’ve solved the economic crisis. After months of study and intensive thought I’ve finally cracked it. To be fair, I arrived at my earth-righting conclusion by standing on the shoulders of giants. I’ve been reading the newspapers, turning over in my mind the pronouncements of the experts, sifting through the policy initiatives of the finest political minds on the planet and tallying the melodious discourses of our leaders. The solution is this: we must all buy more cars. That will keep car manufacturers in business, which will keep people in jobs, which will mean they can afford to buy cars. Or wash each other’s linen – whatever.