Three Monkeys Online

A Curious, Alternative Magazine

Politics Gets More Interesting

When Platforma Obywatelska took over it looked like the end of a glorious two-year run of self-writing stories courtesy of the assorted gang of oddballs and weirdoes that had been in power before. With PO in the saddle it was just more dull neoliberalism – without even any need for the shock tactics Naomi Klein writes about.

Sure, there’s the crisis now, which makes newspapers worth buying again, but the entertainment value of world wide depression is short-lived. Already it’s settling into a depressing round of lay-offs, pay-cuts and dole queues. Madoff was good for a laugh but the high hopes everyone had entertained that another Madoff or two was in the woodwork waiting to be smoked out have faded.

But suddenly, PO perked up. Ćwiąkalski, minister for justice, resigned after a third convict in the Olewnik kidnapping case committed suicide in prison. Nie claimed that prime minister Tusk demanded Ćwiąkalski’s head not because of the suicide but because he (Ćwiąkalski) was seen at a party organized by a businessman awaiting trial on very serious charges of corrupting ministerial officials but the silence that greeted this revelation was deafening. But Ćwiąkalski’s replacement, Andrzej Czuma was another pair of galoshes. Firstly – look at him:

Secondly, he has espoused the American Way of gun ownership: a gun in every Polish household is what he wanted, though like those bishops he had to recant. Thirdly, it turns out that he left a string of angry creditors behind him in America. Fourthly – inevitably – he’s having a spot of nepotism bother over waving his son into his ministerial office. And so Tusk is left defending him and assuring all that Czuma is not for the boot – after less than a month in office.

And on top of all these goodies, Jan Rokita – a politician whose (admittedly limited) appeal I have never understood – goes and gets himself led off an aeroplane in handcuffs in Munich after getting shirty with an air hostess. Palikot (another crrrazy Polish politician) claims Rokita rang the highest leaders in the land to get the consular help all air ragers so richly deserve.

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