A trend-spotters guide to London

If it is more mainstream shopping you are after, then you want to stick to central London. Head for Tottenham Court Road and walk down east Soho and Covent Garden. If your wardrobe includes torn t-shirts that cost about the same as a small German car, Bond street is the place for you. Brown’s Focus on South Molton Street is recommended for those who travel on a platinum card. Spoilt brats can take the tube to Knightsbridge and walk, or run, past Harvey Nichols and on to Kings Road. Kings Road may have been Bethlehem in the sixities, now it is more like Beverly Hills. Old or young hippies should instead seek out Neal’s Square in Covent Garden. Here you can have vegetarian porridge in the company of hundreds of pigeons, and buy overpriced but pretty bottles of alternative medicine. Neal’s Yard is also the place to go if you are an aspiring DJ; there are always bargains to be had at Rough Trade. If you are into Yoga, or feel you should be, then include a visit to the organic supermarket Fresh and Wild in Soho. By now your arms are probably ready to fall off, and you may be thinking that there should be more to London than shopping. And of course there is.

Must-sees are the classic V&A, enormous British Museum, charming Serpentine Gallery and trendy Tate modern. If you manage to visit all of these you will feel like a better human being. If you still have time to spare, then browse through your TimeOut or get the Saturday edition of the Guardian. Both will tell you everything you want to know about what is on around the city. They also include a full listing of concerts, plays and films. One thing you have to practice before going to London is choice. The old cliché about being a kid in a sweetshop is as good a comparison as any - the possibilities are endless – but the good thing is most of them taste nice. A night out here usually starts around seven, when people congregate in bars and drink too much. Dressing up is now the done thing, after years of fake carelessness. If you want to be trendy you can choose between cowboy, German cabaret or 80’s – but anything goes as long as it includes a hat. Also in vogue are mobiles worn around your neck, knee socks with ribbons and large jackie o shades. Cabaret fans fit right in at Lounge Lover on Whitby Street, where the mood is Elton John on a good day. Just like the restaurant Les Troix Garcons on the same street, Lounge Lovers offer fantastic and fantastically expensive drinks. In the same area bars like Jaguar Shoes (Kingsland Rd) On the Rocks (Kingsland Road) – they have Trailer Trash night on the first Friday of every month – Catch 22 (Kingsland Road) are all worth a visit.

If you are looking for good food at reasonable prices, your best bet is to try Vietnamese on Kingsland Read. Misato on Wardour street also offer good and reasonably priced sushi. At unreasonable prices the choice is endless, but watch out or next month’s grocery budget may be gone before you get to the dessert. You could try afternoon tea at Claridges, or newly opened Aura on St. James’ street – they serve dinner until 11PM, then all the tables are lowered in to the floor and all of Aura becomes a dancefloor. This is a place strictly for the young, beautiful and obscenely rich though.

A great place to combine eating and drinking are the flamenco restaurants and spanish bars on Hanway street. They serve great tapas, Barcelona style, until 3 in the morning. For a more Brazilian flavour, head for Brixtonia Havana Club (11 Beheve Place). It is hard to find but worth stumbling through Brixton’s backstreets at midnight for. Brixton has great food too – take a seat at one of Fujiyama’s communal tables and order a Karai Beef Ramen. You may decide never to eat anywhere else. At Sun and Doves in Camberwell you can eat swordfish kebab and admire the totem in the garden. For the super-trendy there is Yauatcha on Berwick Street, which offers Dim Sum and irresistible green tea cakes. Yauatcha has been described both as a worrying trend towards LA style elitism and a perfect place to feel pampered and exclusive. If you want to see what you think make sure you book well in advance. The doorman is lovely but the head waiter isn’t.

For something completely different, if you happen to be in town on the last Thursday of the month you should try Cherry Jam in Porchester road. The basement bar offers a relaxed atmosphere and at their literary hip hop evening you will meet genuinly interesting people and find plenty of excuses to stay late just to talk. If on the other hand it is pretentious culture you are after, try the basement of the Foundry (Great Eastern Street) where you can stare knowingly at meaningless art installations in the basement. A popular spot to round off the evening is Marathon Kebabs on Chalk Farm road. In addition to late night kebabs, late night chat up lines are in plentiful supply.

There are thousands of great clubs, restaurants and shops all around the city. People with advanced tube-phobia will stumble across a lot of them, but even if you are stuck on Central line you can pick up a few tips from the Metro Guide. As far as traditional sightseeing is concerned one thing is certain: The big wheel and Madame Tussaud is always surreal, everything else looks better at night. Try walking from Liverpool Street to London Bridge and Tower Bridge while looking over your shoulder. For all of you without kalidoscope-shaped television windows, the first thing you must do when arriving is drop in to Boots and stock up on Pro Plus. That way you will not be wasting precious time on sleep.

itchylondon.co.uk for clubs and eateries, urban75.net for this and that thisislondon.co.uk for the complete guide to everything